Scene 7

[ A christmas tree next to a bench, red/yellow/green traffic light hanging above. ]

General Tourette’s.  [ marches up to the scene bench, looks down, looks up, agitated ] Great Apollo’s Henhouse! Where is everybody? The protest? The students and their liberal intellectual teachers? The Bums! The Homeless! Hippies!!

[voice off stage ]

Cassandra. They’ve moved on!

[ the scene is quiet again, a newspaper drifts on stage, he chases it ]

General Tourette’s.  [ reading ] “The City sleeps as Occupy Wall Street moves on.” 

[ crushing the paper ]

General Tourette’s.  Boxcar Fire-Escape! Moved on?! You can’t just move on! I was sent to restore order to the Park. 

[ he bends down to inspect the pavement ] 

General Tourette’s.  At the height of our powers, even the cracks in the sidewalk get trampled on. The sweet, still yellow lines that divide the street get crossed. Tennis-court Monkeywrench! Their tents might be gone but they left their mark.

[ he radios another general ]

General Tourette’s.  Coordinates: Wall Street and Zucrappy Park! The Party’s over! Congress signed the National Defense Authorization Act for Fiscal Year 2012, a bill that will allow for the indefinite detention of American citizens. They Call Me Mellow Yellow kool-aid drinking protesters must have got wind of that and rather than face good old Uncle Sam, “moved on.” They left without a trace. Good, I’m glad we won’t have to pick up their trash. 

[ he throws the newspaper to the wind ]

[ he radios again ]

General Tourette’s.  Great grey spacemeat! Mobilize the troops. Those fellas are going to need new jobs when they come back from Iraq. I hate to see the look on their faces when they see the shape this place is in. Those Occupiers gotta be somewhere. We’re going mob hunting. 

[ with the lights out: end scene ]


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